Daily Show Video - Mar. 22, 2011
John returns from vacation to find trouble in Japan and Libya.
"When we left, the world's two biggest trouble spots were Wisconsin and the set of Two and a Half Men. And then suddenly, all holy hell is breaking loose."
"Wars aren't kids, where you don't have to pay attention to the youngest one because the oldest two will take care of it."
"You can't simultaneously fire teachers and Tomahawk missiles."